Do you really know who you are involved with? Sometimes they are not the person they portray. For those of you who are already married, ask yourself, if you knew back then what you know now, would you have made that commitment?
In a world of deceit, scams, fraud, criminals, the Internet, im chat rooms, text and photo messaging, and temptations around every single corner, wouldn't you want to know everything you possibly could?
Although this type of investigation cannot insure a happy marriage/relationship, it will help obtain additional information, which will be vital in allowing you to make an informed decision before you step down the aisle.
Often we hear from those who are interested in finding out if their soon to be spouse has an unknown past.
For example, one young bride to be, we'll call Sarah, hired us to find out if her husband-to-be, we'll call, Chris, had any record involving violent behavior before they tied the knot.
He did not have a record for violent behavior, however, he had an arrest record for stalking, three different times, just two years before. In addition, in one of those stalking incidents, he removed property from outside the victim's home on a backyard deck, worth more than $800 and was charged with trespassing and burglary. For Sarah, this news sat uneasy with her and her parents and in the end, she decided to take a second look and decided not to marry Chris.
How many of you wish they had checked out their spouses before they were married. After all, when two people get together, what is their main source of information about each other? That is correct... Each other. There is no one to really back up information that you receive. How do you know that what they say is the truth, or how much isn't being told to you, that perhaps should have been?
We all know there are always things in our past we would rather not tell out of humiliation or just a desire to put the past in the past. A lot of times we hear people say, the past doesn't matter, however, in reality these days, the past REALLY DOES matter. The past behavior, criminal records, employment records, relationships, education and credit checks are all a small part of what you should be aware of before marrying anyone.
In today's world of private investigations, it is a common practice to hire an investigator to even check their current spouses past even after they are married.
There are many reasons why you want to check someones past. You may want to check, for records for violent behavior, such as domestic abuse, and other cases such as bankruptcies, alcohol and drug addictions, criminal records, mental health issues such a frequent suicide attempts, credit history, and even employment history.
When we're "in love", precautionary thinking is not usually at the top of our list or foremost on our minds. Maybe it should be. How many mistakes could have been avoided had we checked the future spouse's background or past in some form to see if the truth was told or left out all together.
Consider this. The cost of this service is much less than the cost for getting a divorce and once it's too late, it's really too late!
Marriage is a big risk, today. You have a lot at stake. You need to know if they are telling the truth. Is he who he says he is? Does she really have a master’s degree?
Has he/she been married five times? They have given up children for adoption? Did they ever get charged with a crime? Have they ever been fired from an employer and if so why? there are endless questions you could ask.
It does not hurt to investigate a spouse even after the fact.
One husband, we'll call Patrick was surprised to learn that his wife, we'll call Leah, hadn't worked for 18 years of her working life before they met, and because she was working when they met, he assumed she was a productive member of society who always held down a job and had career goals.
Instead she became unemployed, unable to hold down a job, starting writing bad checks, started drinking and taking various pain medications and was even stealing money from various family members to hide just how much she was spending on medications and alcohol. Leah ended up being so strung out on medications she would not sleep day or night and be up all night while Patrick was sleeping, typing away on the computer.
Patrick also found out that while he was sleeping, she was carrying on a slew of online communications with men from several states using email, chat rooms, social networking sites, etc... He wanted reasons to validate his lack of trust, and reasons for her change in personality and lifestyle since they wed and he wanted to know if there was anything he needed to be even more concerned about.
This is the type of information that he had never pursued before they were married. If he had, he would have found that she quit high school, had been pregnant at 17, had been unemployed until she was in her 30's and that she had a mental health incidents when she attempted to slit her wrist more than three times just two years before they met. She had told him when they first met that the attempted suicide scar was a scar from a car accident in high school. Which by the way did not happen.
Even though these things don't seem that bad to you or I, the truth is, she was living a lie and was not the person he thought he married. Everything he thought he knew about her was false and there were something he said to me that he had wished he knew because it would have definitely changed his mind on deciding to marry he
If you know someone who plans on getting married, you may suggest a Pre-Marital background investigation by a Private Investigator. At the very least, It could save years of heartache and that is a good investment. The nice, pretty sweet girl, that is loads of fun behind closed doors, just may be psychotic, have a criminal record, a mental health issue, and a drug addiction that you don't know about, because it's a secret.
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